Enjoy our favorite dad-themed tweets from parents this week!
Hi. I'm Dad. You may know me from "Because I Said So!," "Turn Off The Light/Shut The Door!" and the classic "Only Daddy Can Use That Word!"
— Professor Mehriarty (@TheAlexNevil) May 10, 2017
I know it's rude to ask someone about their pregnancy if you're unsure, but my hubby looks about 4 months along & the suspense is killing me
— Marlebean (@Marlebean) August 15, 2013
I cannot stress enough how much I want nothing from Home Depot for Father's Day.
— Rodney Lacroix (@moooooog35) June 5, 2017
If you don't sneeze loud enough for the entire neighborhood to hear, are you really even a dad?
— You know (@Tmoney68) June 2, 2017
DAD: Twister? I barely know her!
SON: Dad, stop mowing, I'm serious!
DAD: [clutching mower getting sucked away] HIII SERIOOUUS I'MM DAAAAD pic.twitter.com/nCmrxrVh9G
— Terry F (@daemonic3) June 5, 2017
7: I want a tv
Me: save ur allowance
M: why not?
7: im saving for a fathers day present
And thats how my son conned me out of a tv
— DaddyJew (@DaddyJew) May 24, 2017
Accidentally played dad instead of dead when I encountered a bear and now it can ride a bike without training wheels.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) February 11, 2015
Told my dad that my son thinks his toothbrush is haunted. He reminded me about the time I burned down the garage.
— eric (@ericsshadow) June 5, 2017
4yo: "Daaaaddy! I need your help! I'm in the bathroom! I tried to practice wiping my own butt!"
Me: "How'd it go?"
4yo: "Not too good."
— ReasonsMySonIsCrying (@ReasonsMySonCry) May 17, 2016
My daughter is still fond of telling the chilling tale of “the time I helped Daddy take out the recycling & SOMETHING I DREW WAS IN THERE!”
— Ian Conway (@IanConway) May 19, 2017
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